Psychotherapy

Although you can never accurately estimate how long therapy can take, there are some fundamental principles that make therapy effective for many people. The following is a brief and largely condensed explanation to help you get an idea. 

1. Research has found that the most effective part of therapy is the relationship between client and therapist. No matter what specific type of therapy you are taking part in, there must always be an underlying sense of trust, safety within the relationship, and knowledge that your therapist will not be judgmental towards you, even if you feel judged sometimes (we will get to that later). The therapeutic relationship can be healing in of itself as it subtly works throughout the time you spend with your therapist by allowing you to navigate conflict in a healthy manner, feel supported and validated, and create a sense that there is someone in your corner rooting for you as you tackle challenges in your life. 

2. When you first start therapy it is important to set your goals and expectations for what you want to get out of the experience. This will become the initial metric that you and your therapist will go back to time and time again not only to gauge your progress, but also to see how your goals might have changed once you have learned more about yourself. This is also the start of feeling hopeful that things can in fact change, whether it's externally in your life or within yourself. 

3. After the first several sessions your therapist might start to have an idea of what your needs are. Rather than jump into the heavy stuff, many therapists first focus on coping skills and making sure you have everything you need to regulate your emotional state as well as handle crises and other unexpected external challenges within your life. The last thing any therapist wants to do is make their clients worse, although sometimes it does get worse before it gets better. 

4. Once you and your therapist are on the same page regarding how well you are managing life it is time to get into trauma that may have had an effect on the way you see yourself and the rest of the world. I use the word trauma in a broad sense, defined as any experience that changes our perception or orientation within the context of our environment. Everyone goes through some type of trauma periodically in life, and not all trauma in necessarily bad. The goal is to process and integrate trauma within the context of our present day life while also taking lessons of wisdom from the experiences in order to grow as human beings. Two major themes here are resilience and post-traumatic growth.